bs Clone 2014

Hi there people, as I said in my last post long before this one: Long time no see.
I am sure there are a lot of new members here and that is cool, but I hope some of the old ones are still here too.

I have a “new” song that I hope to finish the upcoming weekend and I would love some input on it as it stands this far from all you good people.
Both on sound and lyrics.

This one took a looong time to finish.
I started it in 2009 and finished composing the last part and words 2 weeks ago.
So I’ve been through C4 to C7 on this. Starting doing it in C4 32 bit and migrated the project to 64 bit into C6.
Now I am finishing it in C7 64.
0,00 to 2,25 was done in 2009
2,25 to 3,50 (backing and vocals) was done in 2011 or so.
The lead was done just days ago
3.50 and out was done the last few weeks.
Same with the lyric.
It is a dual song between me and Runa, meaning we sing most everything at the same time in octaves. Not a usual way of doing vocals but I liked the principle :slight_smile:

I want to be painstakingly honest on this song: the idea came to me after hearing Black Sabbath/Heaven & Hells then new album “the devil that you know”
I’ve always loved Black Sabbath with Dio on vocals and as I heard “atom & evil” (opening song on “the devil that you know”) I just knew I had to at least try to write something like it.
And this song is it, hehe
The lyric is meant to be Black Sabbath/Heaven & Hell like but with a positive message.
Do not know if I succeeded, I’d really love some input on this.
I’ll post the lyric in the post after this.

Also: I only call it BS clone now, does any of you have a good title for me?
Obviously the vocals are not quite there yet, but what do you think of the principle of doing a song this way?
Meaning: octaves more or less through the whole song?

I personally like it but I am somewhat biased, so it would be good to know what you people think about this.
We will fix all that we can on vocals and mix this weekend, so any tips before that would come in handy :slight_smile:
Get it here:

And please, if nothing else: help me with the song title.

All the best, Kim :nerd:

The lyric:

Bs Clone 2014
Words & Music:
Kim Christiansen 2009 - 2014.

I don’t know where your shoe hurts.
I don’t know which tooth that aches.
But you’re clearly not yourself.
Not like you to be whining like a whelp

So few sins too great -
to try to recreate -
some kind of balance in your life.
Make this a warning -
make this your wakeup call
don’t lock yourself up in a cell.

When the night comes with your demons -
turn your back and go to sleep.
Let the dark be your caress -
gather strength to pierce the ceiling.

It never is too late -
to find your rightful place.
To be the one you are inside
A life of yearning -
is coming to an end
It’s time to claim your wishing well

The world is vile and condescending.
If you don’t stand you’ll be put down.
The quest is long and never ending…
for the truth inside - some peace of mind - it never ends…

Lead

You’ll never get all that you dream of.
(You) might still feel that you’re not free.
For every truth there is a lie
It’s up to you - make your own deductions/decisions (will be changed to decisions in final version).

Well; is it that too late?
Will you put it down to fate -
Or stand for what you know is right?
Show your true meaning,and who you really are.
Throw off/discard the blanket of old fears.

(Now tell me where you’re going.
Remove the veil before your eyes…
It’s time to realize.)

Like the arrangement and mix, could have a bit more bass IMHO…I reckon the female vox is mixed a little hi and sounds a bit folksy, reckon if it was a bit lower in the mix it would work better, again just my opinion…we’d all do it different…

how’s about calling it “Demonite”

good work and it’s a shame you don’t visit the forum more often…Kevin

Hi there Kevin and thanks for listening (again :slight_smile: ).
The mix is something I am going to look very closely into when it comes to releasing the song.
Have to do this by ear since she is alreay lower by far in decibel in the mix than me.
She cuts through more than me since she sings up there and I am way down low.
But I’ll fix that.

“Demonite”… Great title but I do not know that word…
What do you put into this word, what is the meaning?

All the best, Kim

Just a made up word…in your song you mention demon and you mention night so i put the two together and spelt it differently…
the lyrics can be interpreted in various ways by different listeners so I reckon a title like “demonite” would also mean different things to different people…

best…Kevin

I’d like “wishing well” myself, but that is already taken by a song from the Dio/Black Sabbath album “heaven & hell” from 1980.

You know what you’re after, and it sounds good to me! Agree with Shadowfax that the bass is a bit low… whole mix is a bit bright, but you’ll work on that. Which guitar is this one? It has a great sound. I can’t make up song titles and I can’t write lyrics, so sorry about that! I do think the vocals are a bit low overall. I think the octaves work.

very good playing and performances and some great rock guitar moments,mix is maybe a touch harsh but i can have same trouble at times .nice stuff