HOORAY FOR ME……….
After 8 weeks of crying I have solved this and it could not have been simpler…
And its nothing that was even close to being mentioned at any point on any forums I have scoured late into the evenings.
It was doing my head in that the drivers were installed… and Windows agreed that they were installed and working properly.
And the UR44 operated ( allowed me to hear sounds generated by the computer) but just would not map in Cubase.
I even had someone from a pro audio store suggest I get a new laptop as mine was 7 years old.
This was a last resort for sure… and one I sadly resigned to last week.
Imagine my heartbreak when all was installed and my shiny new laptop delivered the same dagger to my heart….”Device Could Not Be opened”
$1900 Australian dollars I could have done much more with………
Again, Cubase could find the drivers… but no love on the hardware (couldn’t see the hardware “the device” so wouldn’t load the driver)
Stuck with ASIO4ALL still
So this ruled out the laptop as a culprit.
I came to the conclusion that the UR44 was now at the top of the suspect list and was malfunctioning in some way.
And I did all the “ hey use a different USB cable, use a diff USB port” rhetoric you find about the place… which made little sense to me.
So believing all was lost, I dragged out my Zoom R16 tonight to give it a go as an audio interface … with the added bonus of the Mackie Control for some hardware sliders and such.
As I went to remove the UR44 , that’s when I saw it………….
The CC switch
The Fkn CC switch. 
Turns out my issue was “kind of” related to me taking the UR44 to a rehearsal room, and it never being the same since.
While in transit , or when retrieving from my bag to set up at home again, this little switch got flicked to ON!
(Or my kids messed with it , which is always a high probability here, but I will let them off)
So all this time, Cubase has been saying “nope, not interested in the UR44 while you think you are connected to an IPAD numbnuts”
I turned off the UR44, flicked the CC to OFF, turned on UR44, cranked Cubase… went to VST Audio System… selected Yamaha Steinberg USB ASIO driver….
NO ERROR MESSAGE! 
Cubase happily “found “ the UR44 and remapped all my Ins and Outs……
I am now halfway through a bottle of Red Wine while typing this.
If I had a cigar I would have that thing glowing red ….
I hope that this post helps any poor sod in the future that has the misadventure I have had and limits the bleeding to a day or 2 , and not weeks,
Especially as I am in the middle of a fertile COVID enforced writing period, and was gutted when all this went down………
PS… regarding the new laptop……
Well its half the weight of the old one and a touch screen…
So I’m not too distraught … 
Giddy up